White House - Jun 2 2023 - Both India and China have now landed autonomous spacecraft on the "dark side" of the moon.

We await the announcement that "many scientists" at Tr$mp University have identified a flotilla of alien spacecraft that are hovering out of site behind the moon while "the Chinese" are constructing a landing base for them.

Our affiliated future-reporting team at Smoldering Stump Gazette is following the story.


FUTURE UPDATE: White House - July 14 2025 - The presence of Indian and Chinese equipment, possibly of military design and intent, on the dark side of the Moon, which is forever turned away from earth, giving them a platform from which they might launch an attack on the USA at any time, is of increasing concern to forward-looking military minds like those of Pete Hegseth and Tulsi Gabbard.

Both of these countries, whom our valiant leader Donald J. Tr$mp has called collectively the "Asian menace," have planted their facilities near the Moon's south pole. The distance between the Indian Chandrayaan-3 landing site (69.37°S, 32.35°E) and the Chinese Chang'e-4 landing site (45.4446°S, 177.5991°E) on the Moon is approximately 1,891.24 kilometers.

The President was quick to note that both sites' names begin with "chan...," noting that "many people are saying" there is a deep connection between the superficially distinct programs," which are purportedly scientific in nature. He also pointed out that neither nation's announcement of its landings mentioned God. (Ed. note: The President did not in fact use the bigly words "superficially" or "purported" in his speech.)

Lunar background