The Tr*mp Campaign has neither confirmed nor denied that the following is an accurate transcription of a recent strategy session with advisors.
Advisor: After these few weeks of Harris as the new nominee of the Democrat Party, some polls say she's ahead nationally. (Republicans always omit the adjectival ending of Democratic, which makes the authors feel this is authentic.)
Tr*mp: We could say she's a woman.
Advisor: Actually, that's fairly self-evident, and her pitch so far is oriented toward really delivering on family-oriented service economic policy.
Tr*mp: We could say she's Black.
Advisor: Actually, she is half Black, via Jamaica, and half Indian.
Tr*mp: We could say she's not Black enough.
Advisor: Actually she seems to respect both her parents' ancestry and culture.
Tr*mp: We could say she flip-flops on her race.
Advisor: Actually, sir (Tr*mp loves it when they call him "sir"), her Indian mother brought her up in a mostly Black city in part so that she would be OK with that background.
Tr*mp: We could say she's confused about race.
Advisor: Actually, sir, the polls say that younger generations care much less about old racial stereotypes and don't think it matters as long as they're being told the truth.
Tr*mp: We could say she's black.
Advisor: Well...
Tr*mp: Let's move on: I'm having trouble choosing a humiliating nickname. How does "Colored Kamala" strike you?
Advisor: The Base will love it, sir. Screw the election; say what you feel!
Tr*mp: Did you notice how many people were at the rally? I loved it when Hannibal Lecter led the torch parade. The torches gave off a lot of light. Many people are saying the border is scary. I had an uncle who was a famous scientist; he could explain why the light shines. Did you catch the rack on that receptionist?
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